Archive for the ‘relationships’ Category

By Nicole Meltzer, RMT, CHt

Besides questions concerning childbirth, the next most frequent question I am asked by first-time expectant moms is “how do families afford the cut in income while on maternity (or paternity) leave?” From my own experience as a self-employed mom of two boys and from the ideas I received from mypostpartum moms over the years, I have compiled what I consider to be the top 5 ways to save money in the first year of your child’s life.

1. Breastfeed – Besides the well-documented health benefits for both mom and baby, you can’t find a better way to save money. The truth is formula is expensive and breastfeeding is free! Breastfeeding doesn’t come naturally for some women, so if you experience difficulties, seek out some of the fantastic support available from lactation consultants, postpartum doulas and La Leche League. Although there are some women who are unable to breastfeed due to medical reasons, most women, with the right support, are successful with perseverance.
2. Cloth Diapers – Disposable diapers are not only costly for your pocketbook but also for the environment. Cloth diapers are much more economical and are easy to use. If you can’t stomach the idea of washing them, there are cloth diaper cleaning services. However, if you really want to save money, wash them yourself. Once you’ve done it a few times you become desensitized! Anyway, once your baby is past the 3 week mark chances are you’ve already been peed on, pooped on and/or vomited on! My husband and I did a rough calculation on the money we’ve saved by using cloth diapers and it’s over $1000. The best part about using cloth diapers with your first child is, with subsequent babies, you don’t have to repurchase diapers!
3. Make your own Baby Food –The best way to ensure you know what your child is ingesting is to make the food yourself. It’s very simple and is quick if you have the right tools. Take a class to learn how – the investment of time and money will pay off!
4. Join local mom/dad’s groups – There are many groups who meet regularly at each other’s homes. If your days are filled with play dates at parks and others’ homes, you are less likely to feel the need to fill them with costly programs! The benefit too, is the potential for long-lasting friendships – for parents and children.
5. Learn to budget – Budget doesn’t have to be a bad word! Set up a simple spreadsheet with a column for inflow of money and a column for outflow of money. Each time you receive a bill or bank statement, enter it into the spreadsheet. You’ll quickly see where you’re money is going and where you can cut some corners. And as a bonus, you are setting a good example for your children on how to manage money!

________________________________________________________________________
Nicole Meltzer, RMT, CHt is co-founder of Balanced Body Mind Spirit. Through her specialization in fertility issues & prenatal care she helps parents conceive and achieve balance while on their journey into parenthood. Nicole offers pre/postnatal & pediatric Massage Therapy; Hypnotherapy for children, fertility and childbirth; Reflexology; & Reiki. She teaches a variety of classes including, Hypnosis for Childbirth, Tools for the Birthing Partner, Focused on Fertility, and Infant Massage. To learn more, visit www.balancedbodymindspirit.com

By Nicole Meltzer, RMT, CHt

No matter what culture we come from, we all grew up with metaphoric stories which taught us lessons for life. Since the beginning of humanity, we have passed on life lessons from generation to generation via storytelling and this is still relevant today.

Here is why it works so well.  Children spend most of their time in a trance state - a state of mind where they are susceptible to suggestions.  Think advertising…  Secondly, children love repetition.  This is how concepts and skills are absorbed.  Thirdly, children are egocentric.  If they identify with the main character of the story their sub-conscious will process the lessons of the story to apply it to similar situations the child is experiencing.

When I work with children as a hypnotherapist, I use the power of storytelling to help them work through whatever life issue they are facing.  This is something you can also do as a parent.  It is effective in helping children with bullying, bedwetting, habits, anxiety, nightmares, self esteem, etc.  The key is in writing an effective metaphoric story.

Here are a few pointers to keep in mind when developing a metaphor to help your child:

• Always indirectly address the issue.  Do not make the storyline exactly like the situation the child is experiencing.  For example, if the child is afraid of the dark, don’t make the main character afraid of the dark; have them afraid of something else.
• Establish what you want to instill in the child & have the main character exhibit these characteristics, i.e. confidence, courage, etc.
• Personify unconscious strengths of the child in form of heroes.  This helps them identify with the main character and sends the message to their sub-conscious that they are their own heroes.
• Present a situation where the main character overcomes an issue and is successful.
• End with a celebration of success.

Resist the urge to explain the story & how it relates to your child’s life.  Let the child process it (usually during sleep). Analyzing it together will ruin the effect of using a metaphor.

Here is an example.  Your 7 year old daughter is afraid of the dark.  She loves anything to do with princesses and is very good at play-acting.  The story line you may want to develop would involve a princess who is putting on a play for the palace.  In the play she must ride a horse.  However, she is afraid of horses.  The princess overcomes her fear, rides the horse and realizes there was nothing for her to fear.  At the end of the story everyone cheers for the princess.

You may need to tell the story many times to your child before you start to see results.  Just know that, on some level they are processing the lessons.  And most importantly, have fun with it!

________________________________________________________________________

Nicole Meltzer, RMT, CHt is co-founder of Balanced Body Mind Spirit.  Through her specialization in fertility issues & prenatal care she helps parents conceive and achieve balance while on their journey into parenthood.  Nicole offers pre/postnatal & pediatric Massage Therapy; Hypnotherapy for children, fertility and childbirth; Reflexology; & Reiki.  She teaches a variety of classes including, Hypnosis for Childbirth, Tools for the Birthing Partner, Focused on Fertility, and Infant Massage.  To learn more, visit www.balancedbodymindspirit.com

It’s that time of year for fresh starts and organization.  Marcia Garcia shares with York Region Parent some ideas to get your bills organized!

1. KEEP YOUR PENDING BILLS TOGETHER, IN ONE DESIGNATED AREA. As soon as your mail arrives, or at your designated mail sorting time, sort through the mail, separating your pending bills from all of your other mail. When done sorting, immediately place your pending bills in a bill paying system. Of course, we recommend the Get Organized Now!^TM Easy Bill Paying System!

2. DO NOT SEPARATE EACH PENDING BILL INTO A SEPARATE FOLDER. Whatever you do, don’t put your utility bill in one folder, your car insurance bill in another folder and your membership dues bill in another. All pending bills should be together so they can be paid without having to search 10 different places to find them.

With the Get Organized Now!^TM Easy Bill Paying System, all of your pending bills are conveniently placed together in the very first pocket. All paid invoices then get filed in the individual categorized pockets that follow. This system works like a dream!

3. DESIGNATE 2 TO 4 REGULAR DAYS PER MONTH TO PAY YOUR BILLS. Ninety-nine percent of the time, you don’t have to drop everything you’re doing when you get a bill in the mail to pay it immediately. Designate 2 to 4 consistent days per month and do all of your bill paying on those days.

My husband and I pay our bills on the 8th and 22nd of each month. You may do the same, or perhaps you might want to pay any pending bills one day per week, such as, every Friday.

4. PAY YOUR BILLS IN ONE PLACE AND KEEP ALL OF YOUR BILL PAYING ESSENTIALS TOGETHER. In order to speed up your bill paying efforts, always pay your bills in one place, whether that place be your desk, the kitchen table, etc. Wherever it is, this area should be equipped with your bill paying system, checkbook, envelopes, stamps, pens, pencils, a calculator, tape, a stapler and return address labels. Keep all of these supplies in a plastic container.

5. IMMEDIATELY RECORD YOUR PAID BILLS. As soon as you pay each bill, immediately record the payment in your check register or computer software register. Don’t wait until later because if you do, there’s a good chance you will forget. And once you forget, you’ll have to waste time and money later dealing with overdrawn account fees.

6. IMMEDIATELY STORE PAID INVOICES AND RECEIPTS. Once you pay your bills, mark your copy or section of the invoice with the Date Paid, Check Number and Amount Paid. Then, file each into the appropriate pocket of your Bill Paying System with one pocket for each category; i.e. Utilities, Insurance, Credit Cards, etc.

7. ORGANIZE YOUR CANCELLED CHECKS AND CHECKING ACCOUNT STATEMENTS. Every month you will receive checking account statements, and possibly cancelled checks, from your bank. Immediately place them in a folder until your designated monthly date rolls around to reconcile your checking account. Then, keep your statements and cancelled checks all together in a folder for the year. You may need to retrieve them later for your accountant when tax season rolls around.

By the way, any bank statements and/or cancelled checks more than a year old can be stored away in a different area than your current files. You may also consider checking with your accountant to determine how long he or she suggests you need to keep this information.

8. CONDENSE YOUR CREDIT CARDS. The more credit cards you have, the more difficult it is going to be to keep them organized, and the longer it’s going to take you to pay your bills. Whenever possible, condense your many credit cards into 2 or 3 credit cards, and get rid of the rest.

9. PREPARE ENVELOPES FOR RECURRING BILLS BEFOREHAND. For recurring bills, such as mortgage, rent or loan payments, you’ll save a lot of time preparing a bunch of envelopes for each beforehand. For example, let’s say you have to pay the rent each month. Make a year’s worth of envelopes out with your landlord’s name and mailing address, your return address and a stamp. This way, everything will be all set to go each month. You just write out a check, place it in the prepared envelope and mail.

10. SIMPLIFY EVEN MORE WITH INEXPENSIVE MONEY MANAGEMENT SOFTWARE. If you’re paying your bills manually, you may consider purchasing inexpensive, money management software. My husband and I use Quicken. It’s a breeze to set up and reduces the time it takes us to pay our bills by more than 50%. Plus, it’s a great time saver at tax time because it will automatically organize all of your income and expenses, with a print-out, ready for your accountant.

by Maria Gracia - Get Organized Now!TM

Want to get organized? Get your FREE Get Organized Now!^TM Idea-Pak, filled with tips and ideas to help you organize your home, your office and your life, at the Get Organized Now!^TM Web site
http://www.getorganizednow.com

Alyson Schafer

Yes! Registration is now open for the winter and spring sessions for Alyson Schafer’s popular Parenting Bootcamp. These are the last offerings until October and each class is limited to 25 people, so sign up soon!

• Bootcamp Weekend of February 7 & 8 
• Bootcamp Weekend of April 4 & 5
• Bootcamp Weekend of May 2 & 3 

Alyson’s Parenting Bootcamp is a one weekend intensive parenting seminar designed for parents of children ages 0 - 10years.  This is the essential parenting primer and toolkit every parent should have to be effective at raising children who are caring, co-operative and responsible.

Alyson packs a huge amount of both theory and technique in a humorous and engaging way that has excites parents about the wonderful foot up they’ll have to raising great kids!

You’ll leave feeling confident about your parenting and knowing:

• Your parenting style
• What to do when your style differs from your spouse
• The trouble with using a punishment and reward system of discipline
• The difference between obedience and co-operation in children
• The basics of your child’s personality development and a model for human growth
• Understanding WHY children misbehave
• Tools to respond and prevent misbehaviour
• Positive discipline techniques to replace external control methods
• How to be both firm and friendly in establishing routines and boundaries
• The benefits and how-to’s of holding family meetings
• Alyson will show you how to deal with:
• Dawdling
• Tantrums
• Sibling fighting
• Nap and bedtimes that stick
• Mealtime behaviours including picky eaters, staying at the table, manners
• Giving a child responsibility for chores and school work

Many opportunities to ask about your specific issues! This truly is the best time and money you will every spend on your family. 

Included in the price is class notes, buffet lunch, coffee and snacks both days.  Why not join Alyson?

One of our readers sent this in to us and we thought we’d post!!